About four years ago, the mental health providers who were helping me encouraged me to ramp up my meditation practice. I’d been pursuing silent worship and retreats as a quaker for twenty years by that point, and had taken my first mindfulness meditation class six years earlier. But I had slacked off in my efforts. Since that prompting to be more serious about meditating, I’ve found settling into the mind that lies beneath surface turmoil to be very helpful to my emotional balance. No doubt many readers will find what I write to be naive, which is unavoidable given that my intensive practice began so recently. Still, meditation helps my state of mind so much that I can’t resist commenting on a recent realization.
When I first began to practice mindfulness meditation on a regular basis, my instructors cautioned me to toss out the idea of emptying the mind of thought. They taught me to observe thoughts, sensations, and emotions without trying to influence them. Given the context of a psychiatry clinic, these instructions were all presented from a medical perspective; they followed the Jon Kabat-Zinn formulation. There are many other approaches to meditation, and some schools place more emphasis on achieving a mind free of domination by verbal thought streams. But that early teaching held, and for a long time I assumed that attaining silence in the mind would be difficult if not impossible.
Being a newcomer to this practice style, it’s no surprise that I’m finding my early understanding to be incomplete. More and more, I’m finding it easy to shut down verbal thought, and not only while formally meditating. It’s becoming a bit of a refuge, in fact. When I find myself starting to obsess, and especially when the thoughts take a negative turn (as they almost inevitably do), I find it easiest to just stop thinking. Cognitive Behavior Therapy taught me to challenge my assumptions, and recognize the distortions in my interpretations. To do so is still useful at times, but often the quicker route to relief is to simply shut down the thought apparatus. It takes a bit of effort, and it certainly requires that I remain conscious and alert, but it’s not as hard as I believed. If I were to dissect the experience, I would probably find a few echoing words deep in my awareness, but the loud and intrusive thinking is becoming relatively easy to turn off.
I sleep better as a result. It used to be that worries or even pleasant fantasies kept me awake; there was always something that seemed interesting to attend to. If I shut down the thinking apparatus, in contrast, then if my body is tired sleep soon comes. If sleep eludes me it usually means I’m not that tired, and I either get up for a while or I lay on my back and simply experience the peace in my mind. It’s another opportunity to meditate.
Once on my Twitter stream I wrote, “If you can’t think anything nice, don’t think anything at all.” Although I think this phrase was my own creation, it’s possible I heard it somewhere; it is a variation, in any event, on the old line: “Don’t believe everything you think.” Regardless of its origin, the statement was meant more as a joke than true advice, but now I’m taking it to heart. I’ve added the technique to my chest of tools for building peace and sanity.
Looking back, I realize it has taken a bit of discipline and practice to get to this point, and that my ability to achieve tranquility has gradually increased over time. Recognizing how my understanding has progressed makes me realize that meditation must have many surprises in store for me. The recent trend in mental health toward emphasis on mindfulness (seemingly the preferred label for meditation in clinical circles) appears to be well founded. Especially for someone like me, who once pursued favorable mind states so vigorously that I developed troubling relationships with intoxicants, the discovery of self-generated tranquility is profound. Anyone dedicated to improving mental health probably already knows the value of meditation, but if you have delayed putting that knowledge into practice, I highly recommend meditating regularly.
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1
Margaret at http://YourWebsite
Will,
As always, thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.
Posted at March 7, 2010 on 4:34pm.
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Colette Power at http://YourWebsite
Hi Will,
On first reading your twitter stream comment, I misread it as ‘If you can’t say anything nice, say nothing at all.’ That’s what adults often tell children. The basic point being, don’t say nasty things as it hurts others. What you wrote, ‘If you can’t think anything nice, think nothing at all’ goes one step further. If we inhibit what we say to others in regard for their feelings, shouldn’t we also offer this kindness to ourselves? Anyway, saying nasty things requires you to first create a nasty thought pattern and you carry that around with you. Whether you voice them or not, negative thoughts ultimately only hurt oneself and one can train the mind to make a choice in how to think. A mind disciplined towards positive thoughts creates a calmer place in which to achieve lasting positive feelings. And I agree, it is surprisingly easy just to switch off negative thoughts that can otherwise lead us into a depressive spiral. You can formally meditate or just remain mindful and in the moment. For example, if I’m walking along and catch myself ruminating about something unhelpful or negative, I just focus on the sensation of walking. If that doesn’t work, I block out the thoughts by thinking to myself, ‘step, step, step’. Sooner or later, the negative thoughts have loosened their grip. This is not to say that it’s as easy to do as it is to describe. Some days, I’m telling myself ‘step, step, step,’ a lot. But it’s worth the fight.
Anther comment is, 4 years of meditation is a pretty long commitment. I’ve practised meditation for around that long also. And it is really helpful. I’m not that ‘good’ (although I do beat my children on the Wii meditation game every time – much to their annoyance). But, I don’t think you need to be a yogi master on the verge of nirvana, or enlightenment or whatever term you use. Just having a go and getting even the briefest glimpse of a meditative state can make all the difference.
Thanks for your thoughts on building a peaceful mind,
Colette
Posted at March 7, 2010 on 8:54pm.
3
Will at http://willspirit.com
Margaret–
This blog has helped me as much and probably more than it has helped anyone else. Without kind readers like you, I would have given it up many times, and missed all the benefits. Thank you.
–Will
Posted at March 7, 2010 on 10:21pm.
4
Will at http://willspirit.com
Colette–
That admonishment for children seemed appropriate to apply to the mind, because the verbal mind is very immature. It craves attention, acts selfishly, and voices whatever it wants without regard for self or others. At the same time, it wants to direct the whole mental show. It is not without good qualities, of course; it is creative, articulate, and resourceful. But just as we don’t let children run households, we shouldn’t let the verbal mind run our lives and consciousness. I don’t believe in treating it harshly or demeaning it, but I do believe it requires discipline. Buddhism has taught me much about working with the mind; I attend sittings and read about the techniques and philosophy, even though I don’t consider myself Buddhist. Eckart Tolle’s writings have also helped. Basically, I’m open to anything that will help me shape my internal experience, and steer away from the shoals of despair and insanity. Glimmers of enlightenment have flashed briefly a couple of times along the way, but my primary goal is to appreciate what remains of my life, and avoid mental hell as much as possible.
–Will
Posted at March 7, 2010 on 10:38pm.
5
Lili at http://YourWebsite
Human growth and development classes are astonishing in terms of what they reveal about what goes on in little peoples minds. As every child is different, every parent and modality for dealing with children differ. I hope you find peace.
Posted at March 26, 2010 on 4:15pm.