Comments on: Building a Peaceful Mind

By: Lili

Lili — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 23:15:41 +0000

Human growth and development classes are astonishing in terms of what they reveal about what goes on in little peoples minds. As every child is different, every parent and modality for dealing with children differ. I hope you find peace.

By: Will

Will — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 05:38:58 +0000

Colette–
That admonishment for children seemed appropriate to apply to the mind, because the verbal mind is very immature. It craves attention, acts selfishly, and voices whatever it wants without regard for self or others. At the same time, it wants to direct the whole mental show. It is not without good qualities, of course; it is creative, articulate, and resourceful. But just as we don’t let children run households, we shouldn’t let the verbal mind run our lives and consciousness. I don’t believe in treating it harshly or demeaning it, but I do believe it requires discipline. Buddhism has taught me much about working with the mind; I attend sittings and read about the techniques and philosophy, even though I don’t consider myself Buddhist. Eckart Tolle’s writings have also helped. Basically, I’m open to anything that will help me shape my internal experience, and steer away from the shoals of despair and insanity. Glimmers of enlightenment have flashed briefly a couple of times along the way, but my primary goal is to appreciate what remains of my life, and avoid mental hell as much as possible.
–Will

By: Will

Will — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 05:21:14 +0000

Margaret–
This blog has helped me as much and probably more than it has helped anyone else. Without kind readers like you, I would have given it up many times, and missed all the benefits. Thank you.
–Will

By: Colette Power

Colette Power — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 03:54:16 +0000

Hi Will,

On first reading your twitter stream comment, I misread it as ‘If you can’t say anything nice, say nothing at all.’ That’s what adults often tell children. The basic point being, don’t say nasty things as it hurts others. What you wrote, ‘If you can’t think anything nice, think nothing at all’ goes one step further. If we inhibit what we say to others in regard for their feelings, shouldn’t we also offer this kindness to ourselves? Anyway, saying nasty things requires you to first create a nasty thought pattern and you carry that around with you. Whether you voice them or not, negative thoughts ultimately only hurt oneself and one can train the mind to make a choice in how to think. A mind disciplined towards positive thoughts creates a calmer place in which to achieve lasting positive feelings. And I agree, it is surprisingly easy just to switch off negative thoughts that can otherwise lead us into a depressive spiral. You can formally meditate or just remain mindful and in the moment. For example, if I’m walking along and catch myself ruminating about something unhelpful or negative, I just focus on the sensation of walking. If that doesn’t work, I block out the thoughts by thinking to myself, ‘step, step, step’. Sooner or later, the negative thoughts have loosened their grip. This is not to say that it’s as easy to do as it is to describe. Some days, I’m telling myself ‘step, step, step,’ a lot. But it’s worth the fight.

Anther comment is, 4 years of meditation is a pretty long commitment. I’ve practised meditation for around that long also. And it is really helpful. I’m not that ‘good’ (although I do beat my children on the Wii meditation game every time – much to their annoyance). But, I don’t think you need to be a yogi master on the verge of nirvana, or enlightenment or whatever term you use. Just having a go and getting even the briefest glimpse of a meditative state can make all the difference.

Thanks for your thoughts on building a peaceful mind,

Colette

By: Margaret

Margaret — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 23:34:30 +0000

Will,
As always, thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.